Last night was a good experience. I smoked for the first time. Pot. 

It must have been around 3:15 AM when she finally pulled the teal box out of her pocket. I was shaking, because I knew what was happening. Nervous but excited, I'd never smoked a thing before. I was eager for the high, I had good expectations, I was worried about how it would feel in my throat and lungs and if I would choke and embarrass myself. 

I let her know that I was worried. It was obvious anyway. I was trembling. She was putting a bowl together while I was anticipating my first hit. She took the first and showed me how to do it, I was genuinely confused on what the proper way was but she explained a lot to me. She teased me because I was so nervous after she'd handed me the pipe. I'd taken it from her and was holding it and the lighter shakily in my hand. I had experience with lighters, I used to play with them a lot as a kid, so I knew how to use it. That wasn't a problem. She put the cap on the pipe so it wouldn't spill, I held it in my hands and told her not to look, I was embarrassed. She looked away. 

It was a long time after, and she got tired of waiting. "All right, I'm gonna count to three, and then you're gonna put it in your mouth," She said, and I argued that I didn't have a problem putting it in my mouth, it was the lighting it all that I was-- "And on five you're gonna light it." She interuppted. 

I said okay. And I had it in my mouth on two. Then I was lighting it on four. And I kept lighting until ten or eleven as I breathed it in and I felt it wash down my throat and it burned. It felt good. The taste had a sort of spice to it and it was yummy. We were listening to Molly. I pointed out it was the wrong drug. 

I was worried I didn't breathe it all far enough in and I told her and she said you're not supposed to feel it go into your lungs - it only burned my throat because I'd never smoked, that's all. And she explained to me the chemistry of what happens with your THC receptors in your brain when you smoked - marijuana and humanity had evolved together, she said. I didn't know anything she told me. I didn't do any research on weed before I smoked it the first time. I just expected it to turn out great and it was going well so far. 

I had trouble figuring out how to light it without burning my thumb. I thought I was taking a long deep hit, and I had the fire on it for a while, and I felt fantastic but knew my thumb was burning. The fire enveloped my thumb and the bowl but I liked the taste and didn't want to stop, and when I exhaled there wasn't a lot of smoke, I didn't get a good hit regardless of my thumb burn (which is a killer today). That went on for a few more times. I had forgotten how to light it the right way. I wasn't getting any good ones. 

She took a couple of hits and showed me how to find the sweet spot to light it right. I figured it out after she showed me, I was supposed to move the flame in and out so that the fire had oxygen, she said. I did it good when she wasn't looking, I found the sweet spot and took the biggest hit of the night. Inhale, inhale, inhale, oh it burned so good, hold it, hold it, exhale, smoke billowed out from my mouth, my head rushed afterwards. I choked a lot and it felt good. I felt elated. I felt like my head was as light as a feather and reaching for the sky, I felt like a human hot air balloon. I guess that's why they call it a high. 

I remember she and I were talking, I told her how I felt and she said it was kicking in. I was really confused for a moment, I asked if it was kicking in for her or me? "For you," She said, she was right. It sort of was. I didn't feel much. "You can get a lot higher off of weed. But this isn't the best quality. It's cheap." We talked about how much it cost, she said 120. I remember looking at the clock, it was 4:21 in the morning, I pointed out we just passed 4:20 and she laughed and I laughed and we were listening to music on the Mindless Self Indulgence radio station. I didn't object to any song. I usually don't like Skillet but it sounded good and I liked it last night. Bitches was on. I said I was feeling it. The song, not the weed. "Well, the weed too," I said, and she was feeling all of it too, she said the song was surprisingly fitting for no reason. She asked if I wanted to have the best Cheez-It's I'd ever had in my entire life and I said that I didn't feel like it would do much. We'd already smoked two bowls together but I said I didn't feel too high, only after big hits, so she set another bowl and gave this one mainly to me, I gave her a hit every now and then. I remember the first thing I did was check out the lamest visualizer app I had, I thought it was really stupid when I downloaded it, but after smoking it was lots of fun and hypnotizing. 

I was laughing about how it looked like a wave, and took a screenshot and she and I stared at it and played with it for awhile. Then I started checking out the other apps I had, and found the photo booth one, she'd by this time already brought back some pumpkin treats and we were eating them. We played with the photo booth, and the pictures we took were really bad and in some you can't even tell what it is. 

My eyelids felt very heavy. Couldn't open my eyes wide. 

I thought her phone looked really cool and I kept telling her to put it back in the picture. She happily obliged. 

I think this is her but I can't tell. 

Once again fascinated by the phone. 

Look how happy and cute she is. 

Those were all the pictures we'd taken. They were happy pictures, we were both happy. I remember looking at her as she was laying on her side, she smiled and said it's been a long time since she's laid down and just got really high and that she was having a good time. I told her it had been a long time for me, too, which didn't make sense. We talked about a lot of things. I texted some friends at around 4:15. We stayed up talking and laughing for a long time and ended up smoking another bowl, and rode the high for as long as we could. We went to sleep feeling cosy and happy at around 5 or 5:30. 

My first experience was a good one. I was glad I had it and I hope to do it again soon. I miss the pipe in my mouth and the burn in my throat. I miss the lightheadedness and the dumb droopy eyes. And she said she was proud of me with every big hit I took. I was even more proud of myself. I still feel happy. I'm looking forward to it again. And surprisingly well rested for 6hours of sleep. Wow.